John: Some people in our Quaker
meeting would have been more comfortable if we had asked for a
civil union instead of a marriage. We were very clear that we
were asking for a marriage. This is something that we are bound
to not just by a civil contract but by the pledge we've
made in front of our faith community and God. Roger: Our
commitment to each other came remarkably quickly and easily. My
trust in John is so full, that he will always be with me and I
will always be with him. Anything we face, we'll face together.
I had a serious operation several years ago. John was just as
steadfast by my bedside as any husband or wife might be for their
Roger: I don't know what
we would ever do without each other, because we have so many little
in-jokes, most of which are very stupid but which we find very
amusing. We couldn't possibly share them with anybody else.
They would just look at us like we were crazy! Some of them are
silly puns, some of them we talk back to the TV. I do a little
dance for John and that amuses him. I sing off-key and that amuses
him. John: It's not because he's trying to
sing off-key. That's just the way he sings!
Together since September 20, 1998
Quaker marriage in Illinois, September 7, 2002