Shall Not Be Recognized - portraits of same sex couples
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Mary Thoreson and Wendy Pologe

Mary Thoreson and Wendy Pologe

with Daniel Thoreson-Pologe

Mary: As it said on the cake at our commitment ceremony, "Joined in love and struggle forever."Wendy: We smile and laugh so much together, and we care so deeply about each other. We want to keep growing together, be old together. We have struggles, but there's this love. She still melts my heart. Mary: When we first moved into this neighborhood, it was, "Oh my god, there's lesbians moving in!" But once they got to know us, it was hard to see us as scary. Wendy: I want to say, "Hey, I'm not some scary person! I'm a member of your family: your sister, your daughter, your mother, your aunt."Mary: It's very difficult for some people to be part of an inclusive society. But they can put up as many obstacles as they want — we're not going away. Wendy: We've really worked at our relationship and at being parents, and we've had a lot of support, very much an extended family. Daniel's got aunts and uncles all over the place. Mary: Daniel's friends think it's cool that he has lesbian moms. Wendy: He's like, "Oh, please! They're my moms. Come on!"Mary: The most optimistic thing we ever did was to have Daniel. Wendy: He and his generation really are the hope of the future.

Together since January 25, 1981